No One Told Me

That motherhood would be this hard.

That 12 days after giving birth I would look down and still not see my feet.

That right about the time I closed my eyes, she would open hers.

That I would be tempted to scroll through my phone to find someone to call to watch her while I went to the bathroom.

That the thought of a pedicure and manicure seemed so far away.

That such a tiny little being could have such explosive diapers!

That the lady at Walmart would ask me when my baby was due...5 days post partum.

No one ever told me what it would be like to be a mom. Yet, despite these things no one could have told me the joy that motherhood brings. Even in the middle of the night when I'm switching her from the cradle to the swing to the bouncy seat, just to get a few more minutes sleep, all I have to do is look at her sweet little face, and it all goes away.

I hear all of these things in my head "wait as long as you can to have kids, they change your life forever" "Your life will never be the same" " just wait, you'll never sleep right again".

The truth hurts.

Matt and I are trying hard to settle in, but it hasn't been easy. Sarabeth is such a great baby, rarely cries, but we are still up every 2-3 hours feeding, burping, entertaining, pumping milk (well me, not Matt :) The days and nights start to run together and soon your forget what day it is altogether. I know this time is temporary and I am enjoying her infancy. It's just hard adjusting, knowing that your comfy, soft bed is calling your name and you have to ignore it for the time being. Maybe one day, I'll sleep. Until then, I'll just keep depending on my daughters sweet face and uncontrollable smiles in the middle of the night to keep my mind off the rest.